What is a Relationship?

I have a relationship with everyone I meet from the instant I meet them.

The intent differs.

Here are some lenses that I sometimes use to look at loving relationships

A relationship is a ritual that honors and acknowledges the sacredness of connection.  Our routines are the daily rituals.  There are words we regularly say to each other.

A relationship is a libidinal field that contains us in an alchemical vessel. The strength and fabric of the field is related to our level of intimacy

A relationship is a merger in time and space.  We spend time together and we get closer.

A relationship radiates either intentionally or unintentionally.  We can choose how we spend our time together and into what realms we make connections.

How do we build a relationship?

How do we merge our individual cultures?  One of the biggest reasons for corporate mergers to fail is the inability to merge the cultures.  As individuals, we have cultures.  How will I merge my culture with that of a woman?  What is my personal culture?

How do we create intimacy? Not just sexual intimacy, but emotional, psychological and spiritual intimacy as well.

How do you move closer?  Which paths do you take and how fast do you go?  Going slow acknowledges there are a lot of substantial things to do.  Stay grounded.

How can I learn to ask things of a relationship and what can I ask?

What do I want from a relationship?

  • Definitely the erotic/libidinal energy.
  • I want a home.  To be at home in the relationship.
  • A relaxed place where I can wander and mine indirection.  A relationship is a place of indirection because there is no set agenda.  A place where I can go into my confusion/edges.
  • Someone to talk to, to imagine with, to dream with, to think with. To share personal space with.
  • I want it to feel good when I do something nice for you.  I want to work things out

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